Journal Day One: Identifying Autistic Inertia

Today starts an experiment of sorts inspired by learning about something called autistic inertia. Two years ago I showed nearly all of my adventures on Steemit and in detail. When I lost everything after the murder(story you’ll find in my book to come) there was one small silver lining.

Picking up the Pieces

See while I lost access to my account @lily-da-vine I am still able to access those old posts. In fact after the murder when I decided to write a book, I compiled the links for all of them in a document that is a whopping 47 pages. I plan to use tidbits from all these old posts for writing the book.

**Photo Caption: Babydog Renegade napping inside this morning while I work.

Putting it simply, the idea of writing a book has been really hard for me. On one hand I feel compelled to do so. Almost like it’d be a shame to have endured all I have for the story to not be told in it’s completion.

On the other hand it sucks because what I have to write about is HARD. Most of it anyway. For the most part my life has been a string of tragedies, until the last year anyway.

Life Goes On

A year ago I started a new relationship and with that a new life. Much of what has happened in this last year sits only in my memories although I intend to write it for the book. Like most people, I have a hard time figuring out where to start. So I’ll start with today.

The Plan

Now to the experiment. My goal is to share some in depth thing about my life almost like a journal daily or at least like 5 times a week. I am making a lot of progress in self discovery and self growth and I feel its worth recording.=I’ll also try and share some photos of the day even if it’s only garden, crafts, food ect.

Specifically in regards to understanding autism and the effect it has on my life. Literally daily I learn about some new part of me that can be explained by autism.

Today? It’s autistic inertia.

Here’s a link to the Wikipedia about it

Basically there was always this side of me that freezes when faced with tasks. This was always a point of conflict with my relationship with the now dead John Galton. Part of these posts and the book is to be honest of the reality of what that relationship was. Putting it simply, the majority of people who follow us from afar don’t know what John Galton was actually like to be around. Those of us who were close to him knew all to well. Social media is generally just a highlight reel of what occurs in peoples lives, myself included until recently.

*Photo caption: I am very proud of my growing succulent and cacti collection

But that’s a story for another day. Back to autistic intertia.

So most people just think of problems and then solutions and just try it. The autistic brain is very good at coming up with problems, coming up with so many solutions we can’t pick so we never end up acting.

This also applies to the fact that most people can switch focus on tasks fairly quickly. Autists generally have a hard time switching from topic to topic once you get us started. I read an analogy between autistic people and Newton’s laws of inertia. So we can be hard to get started but once started, we have a hard time stopping unless some outside force acts upon us.

And just like that another bit of me makes sense.

And now I learn a new possible tactic for the future. When faced with too many options, just fucking pick one and try it! Try not to let myself get hung up on which choice is best!

Or when I’m having a hard time getting started, just remember that its always easier once I’ve started. All this stuff is just about figuring out ways to deal with the roadblocks I experience in my life especially creatively.

*Photo Caption: The Herb part of my garden with thyme, basil, mint, celery, oregano, rosemary

My day was not all autistic intertia though.

My mornings are involved with freelance work flow on several projects depending on the day. Mornings are my favorite time really, its when I feel best and am most productive and motivated. As the hours stretch on I get exhausted and unmotivated.

Today I helped launch episode 7 of the awesome new project A Beautiful Thought. I did some shopping, got a few new plants and took the photos featured in this post.

Something else worth noting is my recent obsession with avocado despite not being so into avocado in the past. The last 4 months or so I have LOVED eating one to 2 avocados daily for no reason other than the texture. I can’t eat dairy so it adds smooth texture of cheese or cream without the pain. So yeah, now I’m the lady who puts half an avocado on the taco.

I’m also the lady who eats nieve de frutas de agua which is fancy mexican spanish for fruit sorbets at the same time every day.

Anyway, if you’re out there and reading this tell me your thoughts. It’s probably something I’ll do regardless with the intent of using bits and pieces for my book. I’ll be back tomorrow guys 🙂

For more posts like this, check this post!